The human brain is a magnificent, beautiful, powerful, and astonishing being. It creates ideas and inventions, fuels our motivations, and drives us to action, all while maintaining our body’s functions. It is capable of solving problems with logic while relating to other people through compassion and emotion. We can love our brains and all that they do, knowing the great things they are capable of.
However, our brains have a darker side to them that shape our mental landscapes. We experience negative thoughts, a judgment of ourselves and others, doubts and fears, frustration, hesitation, and negative beliefs about the world or ourselves. Our minds can be scary places to be when experiencing anxiety, depression, OCD, or trauma.
These two parts of the brain exist in one place between our ears and we, as humans, experience the blend of both each day we wake up alive. It can be a lot to manage and often feel as if there are two competing parts of yourself trying to win your attention. I know it can be overwhelming and discouraging when you have persistent negative thoughts. There is a cloud that seems to loom at all times as one attack follows another with painful self-judgment.
And yet, our brains are powerful enough to combat these automatic thoughts and horrible words we tell ourselves. This power comes from positive reframes. Intentional changes in thoughts that are geared toward speaking kindly to yourself, empowering thoughts of ability, and viewing yourself in a more positive light.
What is Positive Reframing?
Positive reframing is taking negative or challenging thoughts and flipping them into an optimistic and positive way of thinking. This is often done through positive affirmations, mantras, or changing the negative language to positive (refraining from the word “no” or “can’t”). It can also be taking a pessimistic view of something and making the conscious decision to see it in an optimistic way. This is done by calling attention to the things that could go well or did go well rather than harping on what didn’t.
Changing our thoughts to be more positive begins to train our minds to expect good outcomes and highlight the positive events of a day.
The Importance of Positive Reframes
It can be uncomfortable to begin changing the words we say within our minds and speak into the world. It is different than how our brains have been trained to think for much of our lives, and takes effort to retrain. It can become tiring, and oftentimes we slip back into the negative frame of mind. However, it is important that we pay attention to our thoughts and begin to take the time to flip them to be encouraging.
The longest relationships we have in life are the relationship with have with God and the relationship we have with ourselves. Thus, the way we talk to ourselves matters. We hear our own downcast words the loudest and are constantly in contact with these thoughts. We cannot escape our own thoughts and shut them out for the rest of our lives. Herein lies the importance of shaping your mental stream to positive reframes.
These positive reframe are what come to shape our world, our truth, and how our lives play out. They create the way we perceive the world and perceive ourselves. They paint the world in a light that is wonderful and full of love rather than full of fear and disdain. We cannot begin to fully accept all this world has when we do not speak kindly to ourselves.
Our words matter. Our hearts matter.
The Effects of Positive Reframes
It may seem silly to try and change the way we talk to ourselves. In fact, many people believe words and language do not carry value or power and negate acknowledging the difference between positive and negative words. Yet language shapes thoughts; thoughts shape internal landscapes and emotions; emotions shape reactions and how we show up in life.
Our thought life becomes our physical life and controls our mental health.
As we take control of our thoughts and begin to positively reframe them, we reap the benefits over time:
- Builds resilience to adversity and criticism
- Attracts new opportunities in life
- Changes in outlook on the world
- We respond from peace, rather than react from impulse
- Promotes gratitude and appreciation
- Opens our minds to the good parts of life
Each of these things builds up to make you into a person who experiences more peace and joy in life. You can find a steady place of acceptance and love of yourself, the world, and the people around you.
Practicing Positive Reframes
Beginning to shape your mind toward a positive mindset takes time and patience. It is easy to become frustrated when you consciously recognize the negative thoughts running through your mind and intentionally change them. But this is not something to be discouraged by! Our brains are adaptive and capable of change, which is a beautiful thing. When starting to practice positive reframing, be patient and gentle with yourself, and adopt a spirit of endurance as you move forward.
- Catch your thoughts. Be aware of your automatic thoughts, reactions, and beliefs.
You can best become aware of these thoughts by starting to journal them as they arise. When you look in the mirror and start to hear the nasty voice of hate and judgment, write these down and get them out of your head. When you walk into a new place, take note of the doubt and fear that rear up. Putting these thoughts on paper will let you externalize your thoughts and make them separate from yourself. This also lets you see when these negative thoughts arise the most. When you can identify when and where the negative thoughts come up, you can be prepared to combat them.
- Challenge negative thoughts.
We must train our brains to recognize the thoughts when they arise (catch them) and then introduce why these thoughts are wrong (challenge them). Similar to fact-checking, list at least one reason why the negative thought pattern is false. For example, if you have the thought, “I am not worthy of love” you challenge the thought by saying, “I choose not to believe this thought.”
Challenging the negative gives your brain the space to choose a new route of thought patterns. You create a neutral environment within your mind and introduce the opportunity to change your thoughts.
- Change your thoughts.
Once you recognize and challenge your negative thoughts, you can actively change them. You get to own the power of positive reframes when you create a statement that opposes negative thoughts. This is the chance to solidify a new belief and prompt your mind to create a new path of beliefs.
This is often difficult at first as you may not believe in this new statement. It can feel sticky as your brain creates friction between a new belief and an old belief. That is to be expected, and luckily becomes easier the more you practice positive reframes.
The key is to continue changing your negative thoughts into positive ones, and soon you will find your mindset beginning to change. It will become second nature to think positively and with a gleam of hope!